It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
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