Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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