How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
