You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
The CEO is puking on the sidewalk and the HR director just offered me coke. Engineers have the best parties
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
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