It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
A giant panda just asked me for a cigarette and said "man pandas gotta smoke too." There is something wrong with this place.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Randomize
