if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
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