coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize