I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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