I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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