Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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