You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
No more jager for that guy. He jacked the neighbor kids big wheel, rode around making jet noises, then passed out behind the wheel and rolled it and broke his wrist
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
