My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
