I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
Failing this, see a doctor for elephant tranquillisers, to be taken with whiskey orally, twice at dawn.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Shame - the story of my life.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
