rhymes with "ouble enetration"
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I smell like Dick and happiness
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