Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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