stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Randomize
