You really coming over, don't trick.
It's like Facebook knows when I'm about to masturbate and tells me to reconnect with exes.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
Teeth make me feel like a dinosaur. Can you feel yours?
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
