At least make sure they are 18
Why
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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