I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
I think he's on the stoner protein diet. I just saw him, at 3 am, spreading mayo on a slice of deli ham and sprinkling salt on top.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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