part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
