have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
I shame-fucked to Hotel California, don't tell me about priorities.
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize
