So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
Dry humping a girl for an hour and then jizzing in your pants doesn't count as losing it.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
Randomize
