Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
everything is bigger in texas. Including my drinking problem.
He chugged from a bottle of wine and then we had pretend sex
How do you have pretend sex?
It was bad...so it was pretend
just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
Randomize
