What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
the gays at disneyland are vicious
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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