I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize