Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Randomize
