dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
