is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
New York City is dangerous when the only bars you go to are the ones that have 'open' in front
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Randomize
