I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize