When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
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