3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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