You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
