I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
The bar owner gave me permission to push people into the pool. I'm never going to leave Los Angeles
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
