you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
cat food counts as protein by the way
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Randomize
