rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Holy sore nipples Batman
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Randomize
