Dude my mom stole all your condoms
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Randomize
