**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Being single is awesome because I can still drink a bottle of wine and hate myself, but I don't have to shave my legs!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize