Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
Randomize
