Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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