just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
