he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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