Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
Randomize
