im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
