Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
As if I didn't already know that I was in the friend zone, our conversation that included the words "kiddo" and "old friend" really was a knee biter.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
