Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
I think i got beer on your cat.
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
