there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
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