dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I want to get drunk and watch somebody else's tragedy.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
