hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Walk-of-shaming home from Brooklyn in a Jesus costume that has "what wouldn't Jesus do" written on the robe.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize