I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I'm going to fuck every single member of the men's olympic swimming team and no one is going to stop me
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
Randomize
