I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I thought I hit my peak drinking in college. Just finished first day on Wall Street. College was nothing.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Randomize
